The Power of a Goodnight Kiss
Do you kiss your partner goodnight and tell her you love her? If so, do you do it even when you’ve just had a fight? Or when you’re angry at each other and the last thing you want to do is kiss her and tell her you love her?
No matter how demanding your day has been—no matter what happened and no matter whether you’re angry at each other or not—there’s a surprising power in this simple gesture…especially when you’re in the middle of an argument.
In fact, there are 3 powerful reasons to end your day with a goodnight kiss:
It creates closure, even if the argument is far from over
It lets your partner know where you stand in your relationship to her
It shows what your priorities are in your relationship
It Creates Closure
A single argument is rarely a one-and-done occurrence. In fact, most arguments and disagreements span days, weeks, or even months—continuing on until you’ve agreed on and executed a solution.
At the end of the day—after you’ve gotten into an argument with your partner about doing the dishes, managing finances, or whatever the issue may be—it’s pretty unlikely that you’ve agreed on a solution, and both feel like the issue is permanently put to rest.
And even if you do feel like you’ve successfully resolved the issue, oftentimes there are feelings hiding beneath the surface. Whether those are feelings of resentment, frustration, or even plain annoyance, a simple kiss goodnight sends an important message to your partner:
“I love you, and let’s move on.”
It Lets Your Partner Know Where You Stand
After an especially nasty argument—whether you like it or not—your partner might be feeling a little insecure, asking herself questions like, “Does he think I’m constantly nagging him?”, or even, “Does he actually love me?”
And before you say “No, my wife would never think that,” hear me out. The #1 cause of divorce is a lack of commitment—either one person isn’t committed, or, more commonly, one person believes the other is not committed.
It doesn’t only matter how committed you are. It also matters whether your partner knows you’re committed.
That’s where the goodnight kiss comes into play—the simple end-of-day gesture that says to your partner:
“It’s been a rough day, but we’re in this together.”
It Shows Your Priorities
Which is more important: being right, or being in your relationship? Seriously, is it more important to “win” an argument, thus “defeating” your partner? Or is it more important to be in a relationship with your partner?
Unfortunately, it can be easy to get so caught up in “being right” or “winning the argument,” that you lose sight of what’s really important—the relationship itself.
After an argument, your partner might be left wondering the same thing, unsure of which is more important to you.
And again, this is where a goodnight kiss and the words “I love you,” come into play, because they send yet another important message:
“Our love is more important than any argument.”
How to Do It
Perhaps the best part of a goodnight kiss is its simplicity—because all you have to do is lean over, kiss your partner, and tell her that you love her.
But that doesn’t mean it’ll be easy—especially if you’ve just had an argument with her. But this is exactly why that kiss is so important; it’s what makes it such an important gesture. In the moments when the last thing you want to do is kiss your partner…that’s how you know when it’s most important that you kiss her goodnight.
Finally, make sure to do this every night—not just after you’ve had an argument or disagreement. When you do this consistently, it increases the level of intimacy in your relationship, bringing you closer to each other with each passing day.
