5 Tips for Helping a Depressed Friend or Loved One
When someone is depressed, he or she may struggle to communicate. It can be confusing and at times frustrating, too, to love someone with depression.
Sadly, the reaction of many people is to say simplistic and dismissive things like, "Just pray more," or, "You just need to think yourself into a better place." Suggestions and statements such as these undermine the experience of people who are struggling with depression.
If you're in a position to help or support a person with depression, here are some positive things you can do:
Ask what you can do to help. Be open and generous. Maybe the person needs a ride to an appointment or someone to pick up a prescription.
If the person is unable to communicate his or her needs, offer some specific ideas. Ask if the person would like to get out of the house, or if you can come and keep him/her company. When people are depressed, sometimes the most basic activities (such as grocery shopping or meal planning) can seem like huge, insurmountable tasks.
Listen without judgment. Allow your friend to voice any hurt or despair. If you don't know what to say, simply say, "I love you and I'm sorry you're in pain."
Ask if the person has suicidal thoughts or feelings. This can be extremely hard to do, as it might feel like you're being invasive. But many people's lives have been saved because someone had the courage to ask.
Love the person. Love the person with words, with touch, with your presence. When people are depressed, it can feel as if no one truly cares about them.
Relationships are tricky. Some people are more natural than others at helping people with depression, but everyone is capable of compassion and empathy. If you're present and available, you're going a long way toward lending support.
