Criticism

Criticism is deadly in a relationship. I hear many men say their wives are critical of them, even excessively so.

However, we are equally critical and sometimes we inadvertently establish a culture of being critical in our relationships.

Nobody likes to hear criticism, but it is important to hear the concerns of our partners. If you can be gracious enough to assume positive intent on her part (meaning that she really wants the best for you and the relationship) perhaps you can hear the criticism/feedback without feeling threatened.

At a minimum, we can all make a better effort to refrain from criticizing our partners. It serves no purpose and it stifles communication.

If there are specific things you need to discuss with your partner, or requests that you would like to make, do that calmly at a neutral time (not at the time you notice offensive behavior).

A minister friend of mine says, "We are all hard to live with." That is probably true and learning to ask for what we want straightforwardly (as opposed to criticizing what we don't get) can go a long way toward making the relationship better.

For the next week, try avoiding direct criticism and see if you notice a positive change from your partner.