The Masculine Journey: Guest column by Rande Howell
Men certainly face challenges defining their masculinity in this modern age. Gone are the traditional avenues of historical masculine expression that men simply fell into without having to think. They are no longer the sole bread winner for the family. Woman’s authority of their financial freedom has cut much of the sense of the traditional power of men in the family unit. And now many men find they have female bosses that shock the sense of masculine tradition. For many, this age of uncertainty has brought confusion to the quest for masculine identity.
But all is not bleak. In that confusion there is also the birth of new possibility for defining the core of masculinity. Instead of falling into roles, without thinking, that define what it is to be a man in this modern age – a different exploration can be opened as a possibility for defining the attributes of positive masculinity. What now becomes possible, when no longer blinded by the traditions of history, is getting at a deeper sense of a man’s inborn masculinity.
This is the archetypal journey into masculine nature. Let me explain by an example. In a family far, far away, a boy was born. That boy grew up under the influence of a violent father. That boy, on a deeply primitive level made a decision that would define his masculinity for years to come. He declared he would never be like his father. He would never abuse power. The one thing he swore was that he was never going to use power to feel his authority as a man. Instead he would use diplomacy.
This unconscious strategy worked for many years until he and his business partner came to near blows in their business. Instead of protecting his turf, he diplomatically averted the powerful struggle by selling his share of the business. He became a rich man due to the sell, but there was an emptiness to it. There was a disturbance deep down inside of him that kept growing until it erupted from his unconscious mind to his conscious mind one night.
It happened in a dream. In this dream he found himself right in the middle of a pride of lions in the middle of the night. He was scared, but also together enough to realize that he needed to escape before the lions noticed him. As he tried to sneak out from their midst, the lions spotted him. He began to run and the lions began to run after him. Now he was running for his life.
One lion in particular caught up with him and put a paw on him to stop him. Bleakly, he turned to look the lion in the eye bravely. The lion looked at him and said, “We are not here to harm you. We are here for you to claim us.” The man bolted up from the dream while the lion was still speaking. And he wondered, “What on earth was that?”
Over time the man realized that by forsaking his father’s form of masculine power, he had also pushed that part of himself out of the working awareness of his mind. Now the interior power of his masculine soul was knocking on the door of his tidy understanding of being a man. What he also realized is that masculine power has a dark side as well as an empowered side to it. In his formative period he had tasted the dark side of masculine power and decided that he wanted nothing to do with masculine power.
Looking through new eyes, he realized that the power within him had never gone away. It had only gone underground. And now, as a mature man, he was ready to reclaim this aspect of his manhood. He recognized that the power rooted in his masculinity was a gift from beyond his reckoning. His job was to prepare his mind and soul to accept this gift and claim it as his own masculinity.
Masculinity is a journey. Often the traditions of history become a prison that binds the inner man – much like the man in this true story. Yet, now, in this moment of history, there is a unique opportunity to tap into the richness of claiming a deeper sense of your inherent masculinity. The inward man will seek to grow and claim the power. That power ultimately is a gift from God and for which you are steward. Do you hear it speaking to you?
