–Jerry Hancock


The Tuesday morning Men in Balance session in Cornelius, N.C. talked this week about the subject of security and what it means to each of us. Most of us talked about how security was tied to our financial well-being, or our ability to earn a living and provide for our family, or good health (so that we could work and make a living)–but most of the emphasis was on financial security.

As we talked further, most of us agreed that true security revolves around our faith and family. Having close members of the family to support us–knowing that we can count on others when we need them– becomes more important as we grow older. It seemed to be hard for us to think about security in non-financial terms. Someone challenged us about whether our faith truly gave us security. For example, we go through the motions of prayer and discussion about our faith in church or Sunday School or some other form of worship, but if we had to face a crisis suddenly, would our faith be strong enough to get us through? That seems to raise some questions . Why? If our faith is not strong enough to get us through difficult situations, what does that say about our own need for spiritual growth?

There’s some research that shows that men tend to think of security primarily in financial terms. On the other hand, women tend to think of security in terms of strong relationships and feeling loved and safe. There seems to be some fertile ground for further discussion on this topic. One possibility is to initiate a conversation with your spouse or partner about the subject of security and what it means to the two of you and how your definition of security might change as your relationship matures.

So here’s the challenge: How secure are you in your life at the moment? Have you faced any recent “speed bumps” that make you think differently about security? Do you feel your faith is strong enough to get you through most crises you might face? Do you and your partner have similar ideas about what constitutes security for your marriage and your family? How secure do your children feel in their relationship to you and your partner? How might you and your partner jointly enhance the sense of security both of you have in the relationship?