Resource: Men in Balance Survey Results

 

5.0.2

Here are the results of the survey. This is not a scientific survey — it is biased in favor of church-going men, our target audience (note the percent saying they regularly attend church).

 

% answering agree or strongly agree
Work  
I tend to work more hours than my job requires. 52%
I work more than 40 hours a week because my job requires it. 54%
I am able to control my work hours and generally work 40 hours a week or less. 37%
My work causes me to miss family events. 34%
I get a great deal of satisfaction from my work even though it requires long hours. 62%
The primary reason I work hard is to maintain or improve our standard of living. 68%
I feel a great deal of pressure to provide well for my family. 70%
I have a strong sense of identity with my job. 71%
I have had conflicts with my spouse over the number of hours I work. 34%
I sometimes bring the frustrations of work home with me. 68%
I am able to forget about work once I am home with my family. 48%
My partner understands the work commitments required of me and is supportive. 71%
I would rather work fewer hours and make less money. 25%
I sometimes get so absorbed in my work I forget about the time. 63%
I have received promotions which required a substantially larger amount of my time. 39%
I am able to go on vacation or weekend trips and forget about work. 64%
I tend to check my voicemail or email when I am with my family. 64%
I am aware that work takes time away from my family but I don’t feel I have a choice. 50%
I have turned down promotions in order to have more time with my family. 24%
If I am honest with myself, I am a workaholic. 33%
My work and personal life are in balance, more or less. 62%
I have no real hobbies which occupy my time. 33%
I feel a lot of pressure to increase my family’s standard of living. 52%
I have no one I can really talk to about work demands. 36%
I miss being able to take more time with my family. 51%
Frequently I am too tired to really enjoy downtime or family time. 48%
 

 

Connection

I have no close male friends with whom I can talk openly about personal issues. 46%
I sometimes feel isolated about my personal life. 65%
I can talk openly with my partner about almost everything. 68%
My partner understands me and is supportive. 79%
I would like to be in a small group of men with whom I could share my thoughts and feelings. 62%
I would like to be more able to open up and talk with other men about personal issues. 67%
Most people would probably say I am a “private” person and do not talk much about personal issues. 61%
I have 5 or more “good friends” with whom I can be myself. 51%
 

Communication

My partner and I communicate well with few problems. 60%
My partner would like me to talk more. 61%
I do not enjoy talking to my partner about our relationship. 36%
I have concerns about my marriage/relationship I have not shared with my partner. 39%
I can sense when my partner has a concern and invite a discussion. 73%
There are a number of issues my partner and I simply cannot discuss. 37%
My partner does not understand the many pressures I am under. 43%
I enjoy “quiet communion time” with my partner. 70%
My partner and I talk at least a few minutes each day about things other than “logistics and schedules”. 72%
I do not have problems communicating at work, but I do at home. 32%
I am difficult to communicate with at home. 30%
I sometimes do not treat my partner very well. 46%
I tend to avoid conflict in close relationships. 63%
My partner and I can discuss differences calmly and come to agreement. 63%
My partner and I are in agreement about most family issues. 75%
 

 

Personal Intimacy

My partner and I have a rewarding, close relationship. 68%
I wish my partner were more supportive of me. 35%
I have a satisfying sex life with my partner. 51%
I consider my partner to also be a best friend with whom I can talk freely. 77%
I have lost the enthusiasm for my relationship with my partner. 26%
I would like to be able to open up more with my partner. 56%
My partner has suggested counseling but I have resisted. 6%
I enjoy sex and rarely, if ever, have difficulty in this area. 62%
I have never had an affair or cheated on my partner. 78%
I would like more conversation with my partner. 66%
I don’t feel I know how to have a productive conversation with my partner on sensitive issues. 42%
I sometimes am critical of my partner around others. 24%
I would like more sex from my partner. 63%
I almost never miss family activities and I am fully present when participating. 74%
 

 

Family life

Our family typically has at least one meal together. 74%
My children openly share their feelings and concerns. 63%
I can be a “best friend” to my children and listen without offering advice or judgment. 60%
Our family frequently does things together (other than meals). 79%
I am disappointed in the amount of together time in my family. 42%
My children would say I am very involved in their lives. 66%
My children are involved in church activities other than worship. 49%
I make sure my children are in church almost every week. 48%
Our family has regular devotions or prayer. 37%
I am viewed by my family as a strong spiritual leader. 50%
My children enjoy family time together. 79%
My partner and I are in agreement about issues involving children including discipline. 63%
I wish I could communicate better with my children. 52%
My children would say I criticize them a lot. 20%
My family members talk openly about issues that are bothering them. 62%
 

 

Spiritual

My spiritual life is satisfying. 66%
I have a strong faith relationship with God. 78%
I pray regularly (at least weekly). 82%
I am involved in at least one organization that helps others. 76%
I attend church/worship regularly. 74%
I am actively involved in some church activity other than attending worship. 65%
I usually make time for regular church attendance. 74%
 

 

Personal

I do not have a problem with drugs (including alcohol), pornography, or womanizing. 75%
I have no serious “dark side” that I would never want exposed. 69%
I have friends who trust me to listen without judgment when they are having problems. 84%
I am comfortable talking with other men about my personal life, beliefs. 73%
I have made serious attempts to work on my own “issues” through counseling or self-study. 82%
I believe men should be able to handle problems on their own without resorting to counseling or coaching. 25%
I feel I have some unfinished business with my father (living or dead). 44%
My father provided an excellent role model for my life. 56%
My father was absent (emotionally or physically) or critical of me. 54%
I take good care of my health and have regular check-ups. 84%